Who needs Sanity

As the country plunges into its fifty-one year of independence, it is becoming pretty scarily obvious that lot of our fellow citizens are not prepared to cope with the present bundle of predicaments / excitements. In a spate of few months, relatively short compared to fifty years of historical events, we have witnessed all the dirt and filth of politicking. In other words, what I am really trying to say is you need someone to bulldoze the old horizon and re-shape a new. You don't have to be clever you just need to avoid being stupid and say the right thing at the right instance. You don't have to lead, the people will follow you so long as you plenty of dettol to cleanse your hands, feet and body to project a Mr. Clean. But you do need to be weary of what you do behind the public radar. Don't forget the public is a kaleidoscope of strange sights and impressions. You may have a brain about the size of a pea but that is perfectly alright.

Like many unassuming innocent kopitiam folks, I have watched, digested and sautéed the country’s yoyo political scenes with butter /oil over the past few months. But unlike the rest of you, being a totally self-obsessed egotist and total brute, I tacitly knew the answer to all this. And I am going to share this with your folks in line with the tradition of kopitiam lies and bullshits. And, why not? After all, with all these happenings and heaps of craps, who is to say who is right or wrong! I believe the country is either moving onto the menopause years, or the nation is being manipulated by handful of saboteurs. Surely the former has to be the answer else where on this planet can you read, heard and gossiped of all things about sedition, sodomy, statutory declarations, judiciary mockery et cetera lumped under one parcel? You know the hormones changes make the body go haywire, and so does a country……it makes sense….hahahaha.

You have a perennial sleeper named ‘diu’, who keeps sleeping through the changes. You then have a senile old dog by the name of ‘la’, which keeps barking at the wrong tree or any other trees, and is being isolated from the rest of the community. Stray dogs are dangerous stuff and should be avoided at all cost! You can’t have them peeing at your knees thinking the legs are lamp-post (poor eye-sight mah). You also have a fella, named ‘ma’, who thinks of himself as the hybrid of Rambo and Terminator: - Ramminator. Yup, Ramminator have a secret crush on ramming and jamming about with a detonator. Put these three entities together, you have the ultimate combo of ‘diu-la-ma’………jee! That’s disgusting!

Oh! Almost forgotten a rising star, or ex-rising star to be precise, named ‘ass’ that is often caught/accused of entering the wrong hole. Not a noble thing to brag about even if you done it once, worse if you have it twice under your belt. We then have another chubby over scale version of davidy Copperfield, name ‘luck’ who is fond and capable of doing the ultimate magical act of self-vaporisation…….aye, beam me up Scottie! Sure, ‘ass-luck’ will do.

With so much uncertainties loaming in the air, aren’t we blessed with that itsy bitsy tinnie winnie window of breather? To say the least, with the present hardships brought about by neglect, incompetence, indifference and ignorance, among other shortcomings, we could certainly use this self-styled Bollywood-cum-Hollywood backstabbing soap opera to rub a few ribs of laughter. But whatever it is, there is one thing that you can be sure of! You will be entertained and kept entertained for a good lengthy period. By which time, I am sure most of us will wake up and say…….. Get us the local Oliver stones and rewrite the damn script to “nothing is controversial but thought provoking”. Or, we can always engage a Woody Allen look-alike to rewrite the script to “everything you want to know but are afraid to ask”. That will give us the ultimate truth, although still a lie but at least a logical one.

It’s funny how the political parties are trying to separate the game rules, but not from politics and campaigning. Every 4 to 5 years you see the politicians trying to convince us that they are “like us” when they visit villages, supermarkets, post offices, etc but on any other day these millionaire snobs wouldn’t be caught in these locations. You would think the wolf would tire of throwing on the sheeps clothing. You would think the sheep would learn to be able to recognize a wolf in sheep clothing. . . Maybe they are indeed the sane people in this land of the insane.