It is the 24th day of the twelve month in the lunar calendar. The northern folks celebrate the “Xiao Nian” on the 23rd whilst the southern counterparts do it on the 24th. And yes folks, it is the time to usher yet another year in the lunar calendar. A time where most of us, home or abroad, will press ahead with the preparation, (and yes, my brother will do it the last minute) to celebrate the most festive of all Chinese festivals. Such sentiment is probably a reflection of something inside us, not sure what that is but somehow it has something to do with the nostalgic feeling like one have been transported back to the past. It’s actually a nice feeling, longing for the past and familiar things or places that we once experienced. Some may say that CNY these days are indeed very different from the bygone years, yet some may still insist that CNY and all those superstitions remained despite the changing of time. I don’t know about others but I belong to the generation of older fashion, and it is times like these that I have the urge to go home and be with my folks. I would………if not because of ……..I shall keep the reasons to myself and hope others do celebrate, by and large, a happy lunar new year.
Life does work in a peculiar manner, somewhat ironical way if you insist. Whilst others are heading for last minute shopping, booking the last flight out or whatever, I choose to stay behind for what is my very first CNY in Hong Kong. Not bad for an old git like me, trying out new things in my autumn years. It is my 19th years in HK, and I will stay here, alone, to celebrate the New Year in the comfort of my humble abode. I am not sure if spending the New Year alone in a foreign land is a good idea especially when your heart is already home. Yet, I am going to give it a try and subconsciously I have a feeling this year is going to be different than the years I have known. But that’s life, and life can sometimes be really paradoxical. It may not be the CNY you knew, certainly not the best but you may have to muster the courage to live through lest you are oblivious of your own existence. To appreciate the best, you need to value the alternatives. Or, bluntly and inextricably straight “Beggars have no choice”.
I hate to admit this but drooling into the night and nostalgically humming along melancholy the evergreens of CNY songs alone via YouTube (why did they invent internet, by the way??), is not exactly the kind quintessential spirit of CNY. The singers may have changed with time but the timeless songs and lyrics lingered on in total serenity. It is also moments like this, that you will, undoubtedly, resort yourself to a spectrum of hallucination of yesteryears. Strangely, if we examine our thoughts, we will find the past as the sweetest despite those bitter years. I remember now, as I remembered then, the smell of the lingering aroma of mum’s signature dish “Kau Yuk” and the overly fizzy Sarsi to drown oneself under the heat of our Malaysian zinc roofed home. Guess I will attempt to make one for myself on New Year’s Eve and feast it without Sarsi. With a bit of imagination over the anticipation of the joys of yesterdays, the “Kau Yuk” should taste just as fine……..I hope.
I have digressed too much tonight. Maybe it is the wintry cold night, maybe it is the time of the year to be at home, or maybe it is the guilt of not being to be near my old folks. The bottom line is, CNY is just around the corner and feeling homesick is always forgiven. 我想有个家……
祝你们春节快乐，年年高升, 事事順利
